Top 4 Luckiest Things That Will Happen to Detroit Sports Teams

Posted by Bob Biscigliano in ,

Since it's St. Patrick's Day and Detroit4lyfe is probably like 8% Irish, we're going to do a holiday themed post here. Detroit sports teams all drank their green beer and found their four leaf clovers today. The lucky results are still to come, but they will blow your freaking mind:

The Top 4 Luckiest Things That WILL Happen to the Detroit Sports teams in the months to come:

4. Detroit Red Wings goaltending, (mainly Chris Osgood) will start using American cheese on their sandwiches, rather than swiss cheese, stop giving up so many goals, and lead the Wings to their second straight Stanley Cup Championship. The Red Wings are probably the least of Detroit4lyfe's concerns considering they are the NHL's best team and are heavily favored to win another Stanley Cup, however their goals against average is nothing to be proud of. The Wings have lost a couple ugly games in the past month, giving up eight goals in two different games. Their GAA is 3.22 since the end of February; and obviously, that's not a problem when your team averages more goals per game than that, but it's still not comforting. Chris Osgood and Ty Conklin will need to tighten up their five holes come playoff time. I think they will and the Wings prevail.

3. Allen Iverson will conform to the Pistons' system, play some defense, and happily come off the bench en route to the Pistons' world-shocking Championship run. Iverson has said all the right things, but he has yet to prove it on the court. The Pistons are clearly worse with him running the floor doing his thang, taking lots of shots, and not running the offense that has helped the Pistons get to six consecutive Eastern Conference finals. One of his boys in Philadelphia says AI doesn't want to be a Piston, but I think a chance at a 'ship will change his mind quicker than you can say, "how much playing time would AI sacrifice if an AI could sacrifice playing time" really fast, and accurately, seven times.

2. Joel Zumaya will officially box up his Guitar Hero/Rock Band video games and return to the Tigers bullpen healthier than ever. Zumaya, every time he comes back from his injuries, claims he's in great shape, his arm is healthy, and he's ready to rock (as in pitch); but no one will ever believe it until pictures of him playing Guitar Hero stop popping up on the internet and he puts an end to these nagging right arm injuries.

1. The Lions convince the Broncos to trade Cutler to Detroit. The Lions recent trade for Pro Bowl LB Julian Peterson has a lot of people convinced that they are no longer interested in Aaron Curry at #1 and will now take a QB (presumably Stafford). However, I'm not entirely convinced. The Lions could either use Peterson and later picks as trade bait; or say Peterson is their Curry and trade their #1 to the Broncos for Cutler. While I don't endorse the trading of their number one overall pick for a diabetic quarterback who is arguably extra-sensitive to consensually normal business aspects of the game (everyone is trade-able), I won't neglect it as a possibility. It is also possible that the Lions could land Cutler with their #20 pick since there is a small chance that Mark Sanchez will be available. That's probably a long shot since Sanchez probably won't be available (Jets will probably get him if someone else doesn't before them). With that being said, Cutler has officially requested for a trade and there may not be any other choice for the Broncos but to give him to the team that can give them the best in return. I will pet my lucky rabbit's foot that the Detroit Lions are that team.

(Disclaimer: I fully realize that the timestamp says March 18th and St. Patty's Day was March 17th. Unfortunately this did not make the cut before midnight March 17th, so it says March 18th. It's the thought that counts and if you didn't even notice then ignore this disclaimer completely)

BallHype: hype it up!


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