Tom Brady Doesn't Know Sh-- About Flowers

Posted by Bob Biscigliano in ,

The following post is a random post about nothing, really. It's aimless banter.

As you all probably already know, former Michigan and current New England Patriots QB, Tom Brady wedded Gisele Bundchen last Friday. (I can guarantee you she shows up later as part of your weekly Sunday night prescription. I mean look at the "side-boob" she shows off in her wedding dress! For crying out loud.)

Anyway, Tom Brady never struck me as someone who would settle down and get hitched. I just figured he had a reputation to uphold. I guess I was really wrong.

Anyway, Detroit4lyfe, by no means, wants to be known as a gossip website, like a TMZ or National Enquirer. Don't get me wrong, we stalk people (and shamelessly follow every known celebrity on twitter), we usually just don't write posts whenever someone famous gets a parking ticket or forgot to wax their bikini line (ahem, Chip).

But for Tom Brady, I've found an exception.

Tom Brady has always been a fun guy to hear about in the news mainly because I feel like Detroit4lyfe has a special connection with him. We, unlike most people, have followed him since his dorm days in Ann Arbor all the way to his fame and glory in New England.

John Mapplethorpe has an amazing story of Brady while he was at Michigan. Apparently Brady was unabashedly trying to pick up a girl in a parking lot right in front of her boyfriend, who had just returned to the car with a handful of pizza boxes. When the guy tried to get past Brady who was hanging through the passenger side window chatting with the girl, Brady calmly brushed the innocent dude aside and told him to "take a hike dweeb." Brady proceded to give the girl his number, tell her about a party, and tarnish any chance the so called, "dweeb" had of keeping his girlfriend beyond the weekend. Classy move. (Check in with Mapplethorpe for any other details regarding this story, since I may have overlooked a few).

I just think it's funny how crazy the paparazzi and ensuing media coverage can be. They take the minute details of someone's life and turn it into a big deal. Omygosh, Brady was seen wearing a Yankees hat. Omygosh, Brad is seen walking the streets of Boston. Omygosh, when did Tom Brady start dating Jack Twist? Or omygosh, Brady's fly is open.

Take the picture above for example. The picture above probably reveals Brady simply disposing of some flower pots from his wedding. Of course, since he looks pretty angry, the media is going to somehow twist it and come up with one of the following assumptions: (a) He and Gisele are fighting (b) His knee still hurts (c) 'Get off my lawn you gypsies or I'll throw these pots at you' (d) He really has to poop. Obviously 'news' sources such as TMZ,, and National Enquirer are going to create some elaborate storyline like, "Gisele forces Tommy to throw out old flower pots from the wedding, which interrupts his plans to poop. On the way to throw the plants over the balcony, he re-injures his knee, which all explains the look on his face. They will probably get a divorce."

We're not like that here. We just like to tell it how it really is. And it's very obvious that Tom Brady doesn't know shit about flowers.


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