NBC Endorses Cancer?

Posted by Bob Biscigliano in , , , ,

"The NFL on NBC" used to be really catchy and cool. In 1998, NBC lost the rights to the NFL for eight years. In 2006, they regained some of those rights with the airing of regular season Sunday Night Football games, various preseason games, two Saturday Wild Card games, and two Super Bowls, including this years, Super Bowl XLIII. Things were going great as Al Michael's voice reminded fans of the "Miracle on Ice" and John Madden's voice continued to sound like he gargles his words with chunks of turkey doused in extremely hot fire sauce. Classic Al and classic Madden. Classic all around.

Then NBC went stupid on us. They went out and hired the malignant Matt Millenoma- the metastasizing cancer himself- to the NFL on NBC playoff studio to help analyze things with Dan Patrick and Jerome Bettis. I could go on and on about everything Millen did wrong with the Detroit Lions. I'm not going to do that because I want to keep this post relatively short and as painless as possible.

I just don't understand how NBC can be serious with this hiring? Typically pregame, halftime, postgame shows are meant for the fans to receive a wealth of knowledge on what will or has happened during the game. A strong, educated, well presented and credible source of analysis for the average fan to digest. I can't fathom how Matt Millen, possibly the worst GM in the history of sports, brings any of this to the table after what he has proven in Detroit over the past eight years.

Sure, he sounds smart, and doesn't stutter like Emmitt Smith and every now and then dishes out a big word that can actually be found in the dictionary, but how are the fans supposed to take this guy seriously? I didn't see it live, but when I re-watched the pregame show on the internet, I saw his lips moving but I couldn't make out the words. All I heard was "blah, blah, blah, I'm a dirty tramp that has lost every last ounce of respect in the world of the NFL. I sound so stupid." Click the TV is off, I can't stand listening to this guy.

It flat out does not make sense, unless NBC felt the need to stoop so low and think that by hiring Millen it would actually attract more fans who love hating on the old bum. Although more hating on Millen is much deserved, I'm pretty sure NBC didn't intend on hiring Millen just so more fans, particularly me and my fellow Detroiters could berate him some more. In fact, the hiring made yours truly, Chip Stevenson, puke all over the place. As if having an 0-16 season wasn't worse enough, Detroit fans planning on having a pleasant weekend for once while watching good, playoff football turn on their boobtubes only to see the very face that has haunted us for the past eight years and will continue to do so until the Lions actually win a game. If that isn't a rating killer, specifically for Detroit fans, I don't know what else is.

That begs the question, "Who is dumber? NBC for the hiring of Matt Millen or Matt Millen for accepting the job?" If I were Millen, I would get as far away as possible from Detroit, football, and the televisions of both worlds and hideaway like Bin Laden. Actually, I'd probably go far away and harvest my own animal farm with the other goats of the world like Steve Bartman and just lay low until a painful death do us part. Anyway, I guess it's a ballsy move for him to show his face on national television, considering the fact that any Detroiter who knows where the NFL on NBC studios are knows exactly where to hunt for Millen's head.

If I haven't said enough already, watch the following video that just further proves how incredibly incredible the service is that Matt Millen provides to the NFL on NBC studio and fans watching:


(Falcons LOST for those of you who do not know that already)

UNITY

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