Double (D) Titles for Tim Teboner

Posted by Bob Biscigliano in , ,

Titles. Titles. Titles. Tim Tebow loves titles. For goodness sake, he's a man of God and his word, right? Well, Tim Tebow certainly showed why he was deserving of another Heisman Trophy this year (and possibly even another date with this bombshell) that ultimately went to his opponent Sam Bradford.

Tonight, the Florida Gators, behind Tebow's strong efforts, defeated Bradford's Sooners in the National Championship, 24-14.

Tebow's leaping touchdown pass with about 5 minutes remaining sealed the deal for the Gators as they earned their second title in three years.

Tebow motor boated 240 total yards of offense and Percy "Starvin" Harvin added 171 total yards of offense.

I really don't care much about this win because I hate the Gator clap (it's like a mentally challenged person's golf clap) and I don't like Tim Tebow because I don't like players who are amazing in college, endlessly hyped up like they are the savior of the sport, and all only to fail at the next level. Hopefully, for Florida and Tebow's sake, he stays for his senior year.

After the game, Tebow was caught off guard by an ESPN interviewer when asked if he was going to return next season. He quickly said "Yes," but caught himself and said, "I don't know yet. I don't know yet."

I'm also not a big Tim Tebow fan because no matter what you say, I think he's fake, juuuust like his girlfriend's boobs. I think he has loads of talent at the college level, but the kind of talent that will not translate at the NFL level. (I do not mean to offend this girl, either. She looks very "smart").

Then again, who am I to judge whether Tebow can make it at the next level, right? I've never even guessed the correct number of jelly beans in a jar before, let alone accurately predict which star college quarterbacks were going to translate into NFL Pro Bowl type leaders.

I'm just going to hop on the NFL scout bandwagon and say Tebow will not be a good NFL quarterback. I would also like to add that with his rushing perfomance Thursday night, he joined a prestigious list of athletic quarterbacks who rushed for a lot of yards in their BCS title games: Vince Young, Eric Crouch, and Michael Vick.

Where are they now?

Vince Young holds a clipboard for the Titans as the third string emergency quarterback makes sure he doesn't commit suicide. Eric Crouch is in the All-American Football League (AAFL) which is very similar to my flag football rec. league. As for Michael Vick, you should all already know that Vick is taking snaps for both sides in the penitentiary league because he ruthlessly murdered a bunch of dogs in Virginia. If these three are any indication as to how Tebow will do at the next level then he is doomed.

Tough list to join there Tebow. Big shoes to fill. Almost as big as the bra that girl's boobs have to fill. What size are those anyway? Anyone care to guess?

UNITY

2 comments

dude your the biggest idiot ive ever seen that actually has his own column. quit tryin to act like you know a damn thing about sports, or for that case ANYTHING.
tim tebow will be amazing at all levels of the sport. and for you to say hes "fake" your just a jealousss envious man.

Big Tebow fan? haha.

To be fair, re-read the post. Slowly this time. Notice how I say I'm hopping on the wagon of allll the NFL scouts who say this guy's talent won't translate to the NFL, but who am I to judge? Nobody truly knows until he actually goes to the NFL and plays. That is to be determined. Probably after he wins another National Championship, actually.

I did start the post off by saying he was deserving of another Heisman Trophy and I speak very kindly of his girlfriend's "smartness." I will not eat his meat for you, though.

Lastly, I am far from jealous (minus the the extra S's) of him. While I respect him a lot for what he has accomplished, I don't think I yearn to be him.

Thanks for your thoughtful and intelligent comments.

-Bobby B

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