No Hate/Respect for Boston

Posted by Chip Stevenson

I wrote a post while back about how I recently started dating someone new- Hockey(do you think she is cheating on me??).  I failed to mention in that post that to make room in my life for my rather high maintenance new girlfriend (the Wings who were up 3-0 against Dallas are now only up 3-2 with game 6 tonight), I had to break up with someone else- basketball (she definitely cheated on me).  To be honest, I was completely ready to move on.  I was sick and tired of the me-first attitude of my ex and how big of an impact people on the outside had on our relationship.  After a 2006 Miami Heat championship in which the referees were the second, third, and fourth best players on that team behind DWade and an Eastern Conference Finals last year in which one freakin player beat a team of 5, I put myself out on the market.  Hockey has been good to me so far, much better than basketball ever was, but I still am having trouble getting my ex out of my mind sometimes.  When the Celtics eked out a win against the Cavs last night to move on to the Eastern Conference Finals, I took a big step back towards basketball.  Is having a girl on the side a crime?  I am really looking forward to the Pistons-Celtics series, and a lot of that excitement is a direct result of my experience living in Boston the last few years.

After living in Boston for the last 4 years, I have enough experience to say that I hate Boston sports.  I can't even give them the coveted "hate/respect" status because I really don't respect them at all, and I am having a hell of a time watching most of their sports team fail, choke, suck, and cheat during the last year or so.  Boston fans are the cockiest people I have ever met, and, as I've mentioned karma a lot in this blog, they are finally getting what's coming to them.  First, the Patriots completely choked in the Super Bowl and allowed the the worst quarterback to ever win the big one march down the field with under 2 minutes to score the winning touchdown.  Then, news comes out that the Patriots have been cheating for years, allegedly starting during their first Super Bowl season.  Bill Bellichik, a media anointed "genius", is now just a crook.  Secondly, the Bruins who have sucked for years lost in the first round of the playoffs this year.  They also traded their best player, Joe Thornton, during the 2005 season, and he ended up winning the MVP that year.  Great call Bostonians.  Lastly, the Celtics sold their soul to the Devil and wheeled and dealed their way to a completely illegitimate 66 and 16 record.  They are in the process of following in that storied Boston tradition and completely choking their way out of the playoffs.  The Celtics have yet to win a road game during the playoffs and are justifiably suffering from the effects of that son of a bitch called karma.  Good riddance.  Hopefully, karma finishes up her job during this upcoming series with the Pistons, and the Celtics and all their fans will go home sad, alone, and disappointed.  I will smile.

A couple other thoughts...

I honestly really like Kevin Garnett.  I rooted for him when he was on the Timberwolves, and I was sad that he never could get over the hump and win a championship there.  But now I feel like he has completely gone off the deep end.  He is basically a caricature of what he used to be, trouncing around the court while staring straight ahead and yelling profanities at no one in particular.  Seriously, it's almost laughable and it's basically just vulgar.  Relax, dude.  Maybe you should take some of that energy that you expend while yelling swear words into the stands and use it to make a big shot at the end of the game for once in your life. 

I went to a Celtics-Pistons game this year in Boston, and the Celtics won by 12.  They basically controlled the whole game except in the third quarter when Chauncey decided to take over and completely dominate puny Rajon Rondo.  Chauncey ended up with 23 points, 18 in that third quarter and he also drew 4 fouls on Rondo.  After the game, I went to drown my sorrows at a bar near where the Celtics play, and I saw that the Boston post game show had a poll asking, "Who would you rather have? Rajon Rondo or Chauncey Billups?"  Well, the Boston fans that I have spoken so highly of during this post really showed their true colors and voted 67% for Rajon Rondo.  That was far and away the nail in the coffin for the last ounce of respect I had for Boston sports.

Lastly, I wanted to mention a couple thoughts that I have on the Triple Crown for horse racing this year.  First, I always look forward to hearing the clever names for the horses like Absolute Bullet Proof, Made You Look, and Show Me The Money, but this year has completely disappointed me.  The overwhelming favorite and the winner of the first two races is called Big Brown.  Reminds me of poop.  Without getting too into the potty humor, I would have accepted something like I Have Diarrhea or I Get Gun Shy in Public Bathrooms.  Secondly, apparently steroids in horse racing is not banned in the three states in which the Triple Crown races take place.  So, the trainer for Big Brown aka Poop Turd injects the horse with steroids on the 15th of every month.  There have been a couple stories about this, but isn't that a little weird?  I know steroids have been illegal for humans for a while but they weren't specifically banned in baseball until recently.  Still, everyone gets angry at those baseball players who took steroids before they were specifically banned, yet Big Brown aka Toilet Log gets a free pass just because steroids aren't banned for horses in those three particular states.  Smells fishy to me and I don't like seafood that much.

By the way, Pistons in 5... TWO road wins

-Mr. Chip Stevenson


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