Gil Meche??????????????????

Posted by Bob Biscigliano

A 5-3 extra inning loss to the Blue Gays drops the Tigers to a dismal 0-1 on the season and into the cellar of the Central Division (with the White Sox). Fernando Rodney appeared to have similar early jitters to Bonderman, as he was very shaky in the 10th inning like Bondo was in the 1st inning. Despite the L, there's no reason to panic. The pitching was pretty solid, minus the 1st and 10th innings, and the execution on the offensive end was impressive against CY Young candidate, Roy Halladay. Sheffield picked up his first 2 RBIs as a Tiger and the Urinator, Placido Polanco, continued to piss on any pitch near the strike zone as he had a meager 3 hits. Also, Brandon Inge and Curtis Granderson only K'ed once between the two of them; 3 or 4 less than they usually do. This while Craig Monroe had a very unorthodox day; wearing the sombrero his lawnscaping company left on his front porch after siesta time.

All in all, I don't think there's reason to worry because today was clearly a carry over of April Fool's Day because a newly signed guy (or girl?..not entirely sure) named Gil shut down a fairly lethal Boston Old Sox offense to earn a win for the Kansas City Royals and a spot atop of the division with the Indians. Not only did he shove today, he is being paid 55 million dollars. Obviously, this is all a huge hoax; it's weird. Next thing I know, Gil Meche is banging my wife, eating my cookies, and his name becomes the most common name in the world next to Coco Crisp. So I don't think we should freak out yet. Put the gun down and take the bullet out....unless you have Jose Contreras or me on your fantasy teams. Then maybe you should just end it.



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